Hey guys, thanks for checking back in to hear more about the work wife. In this post we meet (the first) little ending in Henry and I’s “friendship”. In this post, I learned as a first point, why boys sometimes don’t make very good friends and, well, why some boys…. welllll, they never quite grow up. Enjoy!
After a couple of gins at the bar and being ignored for the majority of the evening, I did what any woman worth her salt would do and walked over to Henry to ask (and when I say ask, for anyone that knows me, I mean demand) why my friend had spent the majority of the evening ignoring me.
Henry was pretty drunk by this point and if I am honest, the excitement of meeting drunk Henry had depleted massively that night. I had decided that I really didn’t like drunk Henry, where was my mate that I chatted to about anything and everything? It certainly wasn’t this annoying guy. After calling Henry out on being off with me, I was further surprised at his response…
“You don’t like it do you?” he asked (evidently more than a couple of drinks down) “You’re not used to not getting attention”
Okay, now I was confused. had Henry spent the night ignoring me to get attention…
I mean, I suppose it had worked, for totally the wrong reasons and all, but still, a badge for trying. I tried to understand Henry’s logic, I mean, he knew he totally wasn’t my type (and being honest more than likely I wasn’t his). Was it kind of cute that he was trying to get my attention? Or was it kind of weird? Turns out, drunk B didn’t make the right decision and leaned more towards the side of endearment – wellll, it was kind of sweet in a weird kind of way (don’t judge me).
Luckily, that evening, drunk B didn’t make any life choices that would be deemed poor or detrimental. Even drunk B understood that sleeping with someone who sits next to you all day everyday probably wasn’t a good idea…
Really? A good life choice? Well done drunk B!
Anywhoo, a cheeky kiss was all that happened that night and I have for sure seen worse things to happen on a works night out, in fact, some of the Christmas parties that I have been witness to, a kiss is pretty damn tame.
The next day in work was a little awkward, not so much for me, but I was actually pretty worried about Henry, he was practically melting in the corner.
As slightly awkward as the first day back was, after a couple of days chatting and going for our breakfasts, things quickly got back to normal.
And, honestly, that’s where I thought H and I would probably tail off. However, it turned out Henry had other ideas, despite my disinterest in anything other than friendship (at that point).
As a couple more months went by, Henry and I continued to hang out and as time went by, our friendship went back to the way it was, if not better. I would talk to him about pretty much everything and (I think) vice versa.
H’s actions still continued to be sweet, he would send me links to blogs, asked for advice on friends. tell me about his family and would never let me put myself down (which is what good friends do). All the while, H was being sweet, he would still hint around taking me out, it was pretty endearing but I was always pretty blunt in my response; that I was dating other people, he wasn’t my type and that work relationships weren’t a good idea. It still never seemed to phase him asking again.
Anywhoooo, one of the weeks in that couple of months, Henry went away on holiday and as Monday and Tuesday passed by, I had this weird feeling, did I kind of miss him?
Surely not, it was H, I shrugged it off. But as the following Monday crept round… I couldn’t admit it to myself, but I was kind of looking forward to him being back in the office…
When he arrived back, I was actually excited to talk to him about his week off and throughout the morning kept peeping over wanting to go for breakfast…
Looking back I actually giggle. Who was I kidding, I, for sure, had a crush!
Finaaaaaally, we went for breakfast and grabbed a coffee. As we chatted away, H pulled out his phone and there were a few bumble notifications. Me…
Okay, maybe I was a little jealous.
And that basically confirmed it for me (as if it didn’t already), I officially liked Henry.
Life choices, depleting at a rapid rate of knots.
Anywhoo, me being me, wanted to be pretty up front about my change of heart and one day on the tube journey in, H jumped on at Oxford Circus and I decided to let him know that I would be up for a date. H…
I mean, for all the times he had joked and asked me, I don’t think he expected that one morning I would actually agree to go on a date with him.
Anyways, following the “big reveal”, H and I started to spend more time with one another outside of work and I really enjoyed it. It was just like hanging out with my friend except we kissed and held hands and weird stuff (which was never actually weird). We would text constantly and now instead of thinking it was annoying, I actually liked his stupid late night messages and calls.
After a great few dates, H really surprised me one weekend when he asked me round to a house party at his place.
“I really want you to meet my house mates” he chatted to me over the phone. “It will be fun and you can stay over” I hadn’t officially stayed over at that point.
Anywhoo, the weekend of the party came round and after packing my bag, I dropped H a message to let him know I was leaving when I received the weirdest response.
“Hey B. So kind of an awkward one, there is a girl here that I dated for a little while”
I shrugged it off, meh, people date, people stop dating, sweet that he was thinking about me though.
“No worries” I replied “No big deal, I don’t mind :)”
There was a pause in the reply
“Yeah, you see, I kind of ghosted her and didn’t really give her an explanation, so it could be kind of awkward, maybe you and I should just head out to a bar”
Okay, so I was a little pissed. Firstly, if there was a girl there he didn’t want me to meet, I was a bit confused as to why he had invited me in the first place and also, I really disliked the fact he had ghosted another girl in general, it was pretty immature and you know the leopard spots saying ladies.
Anyway, I responded that I was pretty pissed and within an half an hour, we ironed it out and I headed to his place. When I finally arrived at the party, I then realised why Henry was being annoying. Drunk Henry was around….
I hadn’t seen drunk Henry since the work night out and after him playing games and basically making an all round muppet of himself that evening, I can’t say I was particularly excited about the night that lay ahead.
When I arrived, we headed out to a bar and I realised H was even further gone than I had initially thought. I was feeling pretty agitated by this point. Why was he such a boy of a weekend? And why such a show off in front of his mates? It was such a contrast to the person I knew. We got to a bar and grabbed a bottle of wine. Chatting with H was pretty difficult by this point, he kept making silly comments and if I’m honest, wasn’t making much sense. As he slurred conversation at me, I think he could tell I was a bit miffed.
“B” he said sincerely, finally an apology…
“I’m never going to be that guy that panders to you. You’re used to having people wrapped round your little finger and I’m not that guy” (This was accompanied by him drunkenly whirling his little finger in the air).
At that point, I got a bit mad and I think even H realised he was being a bit of a muppet. (Or maybe he didn’t, your guess is as good as mine).
We headed back to the party and luckily H’s ghost victim had left. We spent the rest of the night with his housemates (who I actually ended up having more fun with). H got less amusing as the night went on, after witnessing him flash his best mates girlfriend, down multiple drinks, run round in a Hawaiian shirt and then to end up in some grim night club in central Clapham, it was safe to say the night was an anti-climax (in every sense). It was official, I was dating an over grown toddler…
The next day on the way into work was an awkward one. I wasn’t feeling particularly fond of H and he didn’t seem like he was going to be buying me flowers and apologising any time soon (he just wasn’t that guy).
As we got the tube in, Henry was super quiet and I knew something was off. This feeling continued over the next couple of days; we didn’t go for breakfast and we messaged less and less. Luckily, I was heading off to Dubai and was fairly distracted from the awkwardness, but still felt like something was totally off. After asking H multiple times “What was up?” and receiving the same “Nothing” response, you can imagine my reaction when I received the below message 20 minutes before boarding my flight…
“B, I have been thinking about stuff and I have decided I’m going to take a sabbatical from work and go do a ski season. The weekend made me realise I am just too selfish and you deserve better”
Give H his due, it was a fairly tactical move on his part. Tactical in that, I couldn’t get off a flight and kill him for his stupidity around whole situation.
When considering this sabbatical, hadn’t he stopped to think about the fact we worked together? Or taken our friendship into consideration before behaving like such a boy and jumping into bed with me. Evidently not….
Anywhoooo, turns out you can’t stay upset for long when you are sat in Dubai sipping cocktails on a beach. I was grateful to get on the flight and not think about how awful the office was going to be the next week.
After arriving back from my holiday, seeing H in the office was super awkward and reiterates our advice on why work relationships aren’t always a good idea (check out our podcast on this very subject). It took a while for me to stop being mad at H and for anyone that knows me, I’m a fairly heart on my sleeve type person, so it was no secret in the office I disliked him…
Looking back, it was actually quite amusing. Henry would come in the office and and say “Good Morning”. Me…
Henry would make a great suggestion in meeting. Me…
I joke, but you feel me.
Anywhoo, it took a good few months for H and I to rekindle some form of friendship but eventually we somehow managed to and I was pleased for him when he booked his ski season.
Unfortunately, no matter how much I wanted to believe it, there is a saying “boys will be boys” and as you will find out in posts further down the line, before jetting off to live as Peter Pan, H manages to turn our “sabbatical” friendship into an outright sacking…
Honestly, I have no idea how Wendy coped with all those lost boys!
Thanks for reading again!